So, I rarely do impulsive things, I am a planner. I plot and plan everything I do, even the smallest of outings require a strategy and everyday has a to-do list. But joining the gym was definitely a spur of the moment thing. If I don’t plan, I panic and I try to avoid that at all costs.
Recently I have been trying really hard to ‘sort’ myself out and create head-space. But I had been failing, miserably.
After work last week I was bored and sick of not having anything active to do. I hadn’t had netball for two weeks and it was agonising! So, I decided, at first, to look into swimming at the local leisure centre which I then saw had a gym. The gym membership there was a little too much than I wanted to pay so I decided to try another gym. I tried looking at PureGym™ and found that there was a student offer happening and I dived right in.
I set it all up with my mom and set my alarm to go and try it out the next day.
I got up to the sound of Muse and I got into my patterned leggings and my ‘Good Vibes Only’ tank top and left to go and work my ass off.
But I cannot lie. I was so, so, so scared. I walked into the gym and immediately I started shaking, fumbling around with my locker padlock, afraid that everyone was watching me. But, I was not going to let anxiety ruin this for me. I put my earphones in, strapped my phone to my arm and and I blasted ‘Can’t Hold Us’ by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis.
I did what every first-time gym goer does, and I immediately got onto the treadmill, fiddling around with the speed and the incline. I circled around all of the cardio machines while I peered around me looking where everything was, ready for the next time I went.
This weekend I went twice, once after work on Saturday and I went Sunday morning too (my legs are struggling so much!). I was much braver with my work out these times and I tried things I wouldn’t usually.
I think I have surprised myself with how brave I have been in trying this on my own. Safe to say for once I am a little bit proud of myself for taking control and doing something that I wanted to do for all the right reasons.
This is my thing. The gym is my thing and I am so happy that I have my little escape, even though I can’t feel my thighs. But there I do not have to think about anything other than being in the gym and it is the most ‘present’ and ‘in-the-moment’ I have felt in a long time.
Tell me if any of you go to the gym and what is your favourite workout?
If you don’t go to the gym, what do you do to gain head-space?
Please get in touch!
Anxious Alice x
anxiousalice.home.blog 